Civilization ends in 2010: the proof is TM on Facebook

T. Middy has just joined Facebook.He's been considering this for some time, and I don't know what finally persuaded him. (Not my example: he's always equated Facebook with my other time-wasting online activities, like eBay, tmz, gofugyourself, etc, though I have won him over to the joys of wonkette.)

However, I'm not convinced that TM has truly embraced Facebook. He disappears off to the back room for what he calls "Tom Time" and emerges with announcements. "Now I'm friends with Corbin," he sighs. "And Brandon!" Ten minutes later: "And Bob Hillman!" It's as though the police have uncovered their sinister crime ring and have begun rounding them all up for questioning.

Here are some actual conversations we've had since the Facebook saga began a few days ago.

TM (after making me his first friend - so he says): Why can I see what all these people are saying to you?
PM: They're commenting on my status update.
TM: I don't care what they think about you. I only care what they think about me.
PM: Then you can choose to "hide" me, if you want.
TM: Well, that defeats the purpose.

TM (emerging from back room, indignant): Someone I went to college with has found me! On Facebook!
PM: That's the thing about Facebook.
TM: How did they know I was on Facebook?
PM: They searched for your name.
TM: But why? I don't understand why. And now I have to be their friend.

TM: Someone has written on my wall.
PM (trying to watch The Bachelor): What?
TM: I don't want to reply.
PM: You don't have to.
TM: I don't know what I'm supposed to say.

TM (gesturing at computer screen): Who is this person who wants to be my friend?
PM: I don't know. Do YOU know?
TM: I don't know if I know her or not.
PM: Does her name seem familiar?
TM: I wish they would all leave me alone.

I'm not sure how long this Facebook experiment will last with TM - probably until the world winds up some time this year. If he starts gathering followers on Twitter, it'll be a sure sign of the End of Days. I'll keep you posted.

Comments

[Vanda Symon]

Ha, I have resisted Facebook so far, and shall continue to do so. But it's getting harder and harder all the time so much being discussed or promoted on it, and with people saying, almost with a note of sympathy or disdain, oh that's right, you're not on Facebook

[Brando]

It's more shocking than when my grandma got a cell phone.

[SER]

I think that TM's arrival on FB shocked me more than anyone else's has. This reminds me that I was meaning to check to see whom he permitted to be his friend. I know you know one person in particular I am thinking of.